Tropophobia

Tropophobia- Fear of moving or making changes.
This is what I do with my free time, I look up phobias. Don't judge yo. As I was scrolling through the list there were many reactions; I was either amused, disturbed, or I related to them... Only this one related to me that wasn't a 'common sense fear', aka the fear of chainsaws. Moving was a terrifying experience to me, a million thoughts went through my head. Will they like me? What are they like? Is there going to be opportunities there? Will my old friends forget about me? Will I be able to keep my friendships? Will I be able to build friendships? Moving is hard, no doubt about it, it transforms you. Now, planning on going away from where you grew up to permanently live somewhere you've never been before is terrifying, absolutely terrifying. I always knew one of my friends would move...I never thought it would be me. Even though the experience of moving to Minnesota was scary at first, I molded into it. Matter of fact, when my Dad said we were moving my heart sunk, of course, he didn't specify where. My first thought was: AGAIN?! Change scares me, moving is not a walk in the park. Now, the mere sound of ripping tape makes me cringe, I despise it. Like Adrian Monk would say... "There's an old saying...Never change, ever." "That's an old saying?" "I've been saying it for years." Boom. I've always wanted to use that reference but no one would get it because Monk hasn't aired an episode since 2006...I think... ANYWHOOZLE. There is no doubt, I definitely have Tropophobia. I like adventures, yes, but as long as I can come back to my comforting home. I don't get homesick easily because I know it will always be there. But what scares me is when it's gone.

Heaven To Me

Breathing is heavy, uneven, fast-paced. Heart pounding, feet shuffling. The whistle blows and the sound of bodies hitting the hard, cold, unforgiving ground fill the air. We all rise up simultaneously and our feet shuffle again. The dark, billowy clouds of heaven float above us, sending reminders to us, that we are not alone during out trials, during out pains, during our rough-patches. They remind us to endure, to persevere, to do all that we do for the Glory of God.

Hebrews 10:36 - You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised.

Sweat gathers on our bodies as we push ourselves harder; small raindrops falling on our shoulders. Our bodies hit the ground at the whistle and we stumble our way back up. The lavender-tinted sky peaks through the clouds, reminding us of His power. We stumble and fall, but by the grace of God we are able to make it back up, it may be hard, tiring and painful, but we can and will make it if we persevere.

The whistle blows twice and we all collapse together as a team, our sweaty, aching, bodies stagger their way the beloved and well-needed water. The glorious waterfall of cold, hydrating, substance pours down my throat sending energy to my body. I take my scuffed up cleats, sweaty socks and my forever-stinky shinguards off. I make my way home not regretting a single thing coach made us do.

When we stopped I almost wanted to do more, it was an exhilarating feeling, it's the feeling of knowing you did something to make you a better person, or, player, in this case. Once you start you just can't get enough.

Though my legs were aching and my body was covered in sweat, I regret nothing due to the feeling that I came homing knowing that I had persevered, I tried my hardest and was willing to give more.